Am I the only person who finds this video to be completely paternalistic and overly saccharine?
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Horse and Carriage
When I made the decision to move to the Netherlands to be with Jason, it was a leap of faith. We'd been a couple for just over five months and had only been on the same continent for maybe four weeks in total. We were lucky that he lived in a country that accepted at face value that we were, in fact, a couple. Had he been living in a country like the UK or the USA, I'm not sure if we would have been willing to go from zero to married in such a short time.
The irony in that, though, is that by the time we got through jumping through all the hoops required for me to live here, we actually felt married. First, our finances were tied together - we had to pool our money to meet the requirement, and then I stayed at home while Jason supported us that first year when I couldn't work. On a more subtle level though, we had to sign paper after paper after paper saying that yes, we were in fact a couple, and no, we were not married to anyone else.
We're three and a half years on from that and have added a few more trappings of a traditional marriage - one mortgage and one baby. Throw in the fact that it's easier in Dutch to say that Jason is my 'man', or husband, and he finds it easier to say 'vrouw', or wife, rather than the girlfriend alternative and I sometimes forget that we're not actually man and wife.
Despite our ambivalence, though, we've decided for a variety of those most romantic of reasons - legal ones - to tie the knot while we're at home in Canada this summer. To offset the fact that we're neither of us too excited about what feels like a redundancy of a ceremony, we're trying to plan the biggest and bestest party that we can. Even so, I'm finding that I'm not really the kind of person who gets overly excited about what colour the tablecloths should be, or whether or not we need a receiving line. I like parties. Party-planning, not so much.
What I do like is research and writing. We've got a lot of guests coming from out of town and to that end, I've created a website that will hopefully act as a helpful resource in finding a place to stay, a place to eat, and a bit of entertainment. You can view it here if you're interested. Like everything in my life, I do this around the small one's schedule so it's a work in progress, but I'm liking the way it's coming together. It's like my wedding gift to myself.
The irony in that, though, is that by the time we got through jumping through all the hoops required for me to live here, we actually felt married. First, our finances were tied together - we had to pool our money to meet the requirement, and then I stayed at home while Jason supported us that first year when I couldn't work. On a more subtle level though, we had to sign paper after paper after paper saying that yes, we were in fact a couple, and no, we were not married to anyone else.
We're three and a half years on from that and have added a few more trappings of a traditional marriage - one mortgage and one baby. Throw in the fact that it's easier in Dutch to say that Jason is my 'man', or husband, and he finds it easier to say 'vrouw', or wife, rather than the girlfriend alternative and I sometimes forget that we're not actually man and wife.
Despite our ambivalence, though, we've decided for a variety of those most romantic of reasons - legal ones - to tie the knot while we're at home in Canada this summer. To offset the fact that we're neither of us too excited about what feels like a redundancy of a ceremony, we're trying to plan the biggest and bestest party that we can. Even so, I'm finding that I'm not really the kind of person who gets overly excited about what colour the tablecloths should be, or whether or not we need a receiving line. I like parties. Party-planning, not so much.
What I do like is research and writing. We've got a lot of guests coming from out of town and to that end, I've created a website that will hopefully act as a helpful resource in finding a place to stay, a place to eat, and a bit of entertainment. You can view it here if you're interested. Like everything in my life, I do this around the small one's schedule so it's a work in progress, but I'm liking the way it's coming together. It's like my wedding gift to myself.
Monday, May 9, 2011
Ode to my Converse
Oh Converse,
When I was young and desperately wanting to look cooler than I felt, you made me feel like I could have been in the Ramones.
When I grew older and felt comfortable in my own skin, you were comfortable on my feet.
Now, when I am yet older still, but am once again needing to look cooler than I feel, you give my mom clothes, and my ego, the edge I need to not succumb completely into the fleece sweaters and elastic waistbands wasteland.
Thank you.
When I was young and desperately wanting to look cooler than I felt, you made me feel like I could have been in the Ramones.
When I grew older and felt comfortable in my own skin, you were comfortable on my feet.
Now, when I am yet older still, but am once again needing to look cooler than I feel, you give my mom clothes, and my ego, the edge I need to not succumb completely into the fleece sweaters and elastic waistbands wasteland.
Thank you.
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